Wednesday, December 31, 2008

the final word, and the final sentence

I know myself too well
this isn't the end
I'll be running back to you 
going back around the bend
all my doubts will fade
with all your charming words
then you'll take away my heart
shatter it into thirds
this winter will be colder
and worse than all the rest
I will be making one last plea
and one final request 
push me away from your heart
send me over with one shove
maybe then I'll learn my lesson
I might just fall out of love.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

you could've done more

some say you don't know what you've got until it's gone. wether it's missing, stolen, broken, or simply vanished forever, never to be seen again. i never really understood the meaning of this saying. how can you not know what is right in front of you? how could someone be so oblivious to their surroundings or what they love? but throughout my life i've taken things for granted. friends, family, comfort. things people would kill for. i've lost chances i should have taken, and lost close ties with people i've cared for. would i have been so naive as to take granted of something if i knew that it would soon be gone? never. living life with the thought of 'what if' is exhausting. taking chances is what sets people free. making life what you've always wanted it to be instead of sitting in the sidelines, waiting for 'someday' to finally arrive. what will you do if that day finally arises but you're stuck. stuck where you've been your entire life because that's all you've known. does a moment like that come about ever again? some say you don't know what you've got until it's gone. i believe in this. opportunities, friendships, family seem so effortless, something we are given. a right. but it's a privilege. and it's something that can be taken in a blink of an eye. in that half a second it's time for you to decide; will you sit back and let life hand you what it may? or will you fight to make your life worth living?

all these things that i've done


fearful. regretful. safe. liar. manipulative. inattentive. careless. ignorant.
I hate what I've become

Saturday, December 27, 2008

bittersweet

I'm walking up to you so slowly
It's about time, it's about time to fly away 
but wait,
i swear it's different 'cause I'm lonely

fold your wings,you'll need them more one day.

truly,honestly.

if there's one thing i believe in; it's you. you're gonna be what saves us all. i wish you could realize it on your own.

it's right for me

Tell me all your fears
List them one by one
Explain to me all your weaknesses
Show me all the bad that you've done
Let me help you fix things
Allow me to push through
Show me what you're proud of
I wanna see every side of you
Don't fool me, 'cause i've been there
I've been played around with before 
Love me because you want to
Don't act like it's a chore
Hold me a little tighter
Kiss me a little longer
Let me know that when you're around
I'll be a little stronger.




Friday, December 26, 2008

A,B,C+,C,C-,F

Why can't I ever be evaluated on the person I've become?

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

i gave you my heart


I didn't ask for a new bike
I didn't ask for a book
I asked for your return
I asked for one last look
I didn't ask for a doll
I didn't ask for a dove
I asked for you to hold me
I asked for your love.

Friday, December 19, 2008

my heart beating out of my chest

brighter than the sunshine
louder than the rain
this is what I've always needed
though it's driving me insane
sweeter than candy
colder than snow
how can I grasp this moment,
and never let it go?
warmer than a fire 
softer than wool 
a feeling of completeness
knowledge that you're full
faster than a race car
longer than a mile
all I want to see these days
is your beautiful smile.

happybirthday

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

it can't be done



I wish I could freeze everyone around us, for just a minute, and see what it would be like if it was just me and you.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

it doesn't stop here

Hello? Hello? 
Is there anyone out there to hear my shattered screams?
Come save me from this disaster I've created.
Tell me who's to blame?
Rescue me! Rescue me!
I've fallen apart
Nothing left but a few odds and ends of a puzzle
How can I put it back together?
Where do I even begin?
I'm drowning! I'm drowning!
With my last few words about to come out
But what do I say?
How do I leave things?
Will I even be remembered?
Goodbye. Goodbye.
Thanks for watching me struggle
Sitting in the sidelines 
Anticipating my next mistake
How do I become as cold as you?

Monday, December 15, 2008

and if it's real, well i don't want to know


sometimes I wonder if you keep things from me to keep me safe, or to make yourself feel better. it hurts either way. the sad part is, i think you know that.

take a look at yourself

I know that this is hard for you
I see it in your eyes
this really must be killing you
taking off your final disguise
all the truth has finally been reveled
every secret exposed 
your thoughts are all wide open
an open door that was once closed
you've take off your hidden layer
reaching down to your inner most core
but you can't fool me for a minute
you're a liar, and nothing more.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

the end's not near, it's here.

Let's open our eyes to the reality of the world that's surrounding us today. Let's take a look at others problems and realize that it's not OK. Because many of us have been blind all these years, not knowing what has occurred. Not everyone is like me and you, some are living in worlds of third. Some have lost their homes and belongings, left to live on the street. No clothing to warm them, no socks upon their feet. Some have had to leave their homes in a hurry, with no time to look back. They lost all the things that were once theirs because of an attack. But the most painful thing they've lost by far, is someone that they love. A mother, a daughter, a brother that's now looking down from above. These people could have been good people, or they could have been bad. But in the end it doesn't really matter, they might have been a sister, a friend, or a dad. In the end we are all loved by someone, no matter who we are. our love for each other is marked forever, lasting like a scar. But once that person is taken away it's something you can't ignore. All the hope in the world is gone because of a ludicrous war. Why must we fight with the ones we differ from, just to prove we are right? Nothing can  be settled with words anymore, it all gets down to the fight. What's the point of bombs and bullets when it only leads to pain. Nothing good can possibly come out from these bloodshed's it's only for the insane. why can't we see that what makes us unique is a good thing, dark skinned or pale. Let's drop our weapons of hate and for once let love prevail

then there's you

our love is something you've got to hold on to
or else the wind will blow it away
you've got to be ready to take risks 
and to fall down and break
our love is something you've got to cherish 
or someone will rob you
guard your heart
and keep your eyes open
our love is something that'll last forever
it's something you can count on
believe in it with all your heart
never doubt something this strong

your lies were something I tried to let go of
thinking the wind would come and sweep them away
I wasn't ready to be dropped, and broken
your words were what made me fall for you
they stole my heart
and placed it somewhere that mistreated it
i was blind
your love was temporary
a way to waste my time
to prove that i was naive
never doubt your heart when it's screaming "this feeling that's too strong shouldn't be."

Wednesday, December 10, 2008


                               let's fall apart together. 

chasing pavements

don't get your hopes up honey, it'll never be true
his heart is just too hollow now
and soon yours will be too
stop putting yourself through all of this 
it's unnecessary despair
he won't feel any pain at all
and tell me how that's fair?
but you have to understand that this is the way he works
nothing will ever phase him
he's in it for the perks
You can keep trying to fix him, but I assure you that you won't
this is how it is now
seasons change, people don't. 

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

surprise, surprise

"Sometimes I wonder if anythings absolute anymore. Is there still right and wrong? Good and bad? Truth and lies? Or is everything negotiable, left to interpretation, grey. Sometimes we're forced to bend the truth, transform it, 'cause we're faced with things that are not of our own making. And sometimes things simply catch up to us."
(onetreehill)

tell me how to stay strong

I need for you to know
I've got to tell you this secret
I've got to tell you about my newest low.
Come a little closer, 
Let me tell you the unknown
The only thing worse about being here
Is being here alone.


how much longer?

I can't move unless you take my hand and guide me

ask me how i am

For once I'd like for you to be the one standing out in the cold.
Freezing, thinking to yourself "this is getting old"
I want you to question your own well being 
Maybe wonder what it is you're seeing.
I want you to doubt everything you once knew
Consider that maybe love isn't true
I'd like it if I could maybe break your heart
Take it from you, and watch you fall apart.


nothing seems to fit

Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am young again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am fun again

However far away I will always love you
However long I stay I will always love you
Whatever words I say I will always love you
I will always love you

Monday, December 8, 2008

be the one


i need somebody to hold me close and tell me what i mean to them. i just reassurance, i just need love.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

my only fear

I find myself constantly wondering if I have made an impact. Wondering how different some peoples lives would be if I never existed; for better or for worse. I just want to have made one singular person better. Make one person happier then they would have been otherwise. I just want to make a difference.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

you know i can take it

don't test my patience
i know where this is headed
you can't fool me this time
i've got you figured out
don't accept any kindness from me
that all vanished once you tore me down
hitting me in all my weak points

don't come running back with some pathetic apology
some pitiful explanation for everything you did
i know you're not sorry
i know you'll never change

a sunken lie



What is a secret? Is it something we keep from others? Or something you tell to those you trust? Does it have to be something harmful or terrifying? Can it be joyous and heartwarming? We keep secrets so people are kept safe, or to spare someone's feelings. But what happens when that secret is let out? Exposed to those you wanted to see it least. How do you explain yourself, and how do you react? Everybody has a secret. What's yours?

stay away

If you're the only one who knows why does it feel like I just told the entire world? A momentary lapse when all those words just spilt out onto the floor. What was I thinking? Of course you'd judge me. After all, it's what you're best at. Pushing me aside once you heard what you needed. Did my words boost your ego high enough? Did my pain bring smiles to the faces of all your friends? Go on and celebrate your defeat. If you're the only one who knows why does it feel like I haven't told anyone? 

I wanna move but I can't escape from you

You look so strong and brave.
Nothing scares you. Nothing could ever tear you down.
You look so happy and in love.
Like you just experienced your first kiss. Like a kid on christmas day.
You look so free and careless.
No one could ever take you down from your high. No one could ever lock you up.
You look at me and see nothing. 
Once you left you took my strength, confidence, joy, love, freedom, and carelessness
Give back what I took so long to earn, what's mine. You don't deserve these things,not one bit.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

with the news that, it's over

He whispered " I love you darling, you're my one and only. No one could ever take your place. You're charming, beautiful, and you walk with such grace. Your laughter brightens up a room, and your tears make it rain. When you're gone all i think about is you, this love is making me insane. Being away from you is a challenge. How can a kiss be so sweet? The warmth of your heart is endless, hotter then summers heat." She looked at him, speechless, what could she possibly say? He looked at her so intently, as if it were his last day. He took her into his arms and told her "Don't worry, no need to feel broken. Everything you need to say is better left unspoken." Then she felt the words coming, what was next? She had no clue. Then she heard the words she had just spoken;
"I don't think I love you.."

Monday, December 1, 2008

show me how you do that trick


look me in the eye and tell me you're sorry
say it without a break
tell me how badly you messed up
explain how this was a mistake
tell me what I want to hear
I'm tired of the hard cold truth
take me back to yesterday
let's go back to our youth
tell me how much you need me
feed me these charged lies
'cause baby the last thing I need to hear
is your hollow goodbyes 



you won't get better 'till you're worse

I wished upon a star last night
dreaming of your return
I needed for you to come back
and wash away my concern
I made sure I spoke clearly
so the star understood my desire
I made sure I was staying true
and that my heart wasn't being a liar
I looked up at the star, in hope
and checking if it was still visible through the rain
turns it wasn't a star at all
it was just another vexatious plane